Friday, June 6, 2008

the weekend...

Where to begin.
I tend to believe there are reasons for everything.
Apparently, I didn't attend Art Star because I needed to have a glorious spat with my husband in the morning, right before taking off for market. Okay, it was more like...a fight. Like, we said hurtful things to each other in awful voices. And then stormed off in separate directions with our little boy all freaked out and confused. AWFUL. And about something totally unimportant (so it seems to me now).
We just don't do things like that. Ever.
I know we're abnormal, never having arguments or disagreements about anything, but it felt like the most terrible thing.
I set up for what was a bummer of a market day (forecasts for penny-sized hail and cloud-to-ground lightning kept people away, although it ended up not even starting to rain until the very end), and I waited anxiously for C and the Little Guy to show up.
When they did, we just held each other and I cried a bunch and suddenly we all felt amazing. It was very weird.
We are both bottlers.
I guess we've been fermenting and just needed to pop the cork and release some tension.
Our life has been so stressful this past year.
I also think it was good for the Little Guy to observe some conflict/resolution. It's so rare in this house.
We're all still riding that, feeling great, like a weight has been lifted.
So, I missed out on making some money/connections/whatever this weekend, but it seems obvious now that staying home was...somehow necessary.
I need to stop holding onto every little negative feeling and keeping it locked up inside me. It's like poison.
I wish C could farm full-time. I wish we didn't need the job that makes him feel like all the most interesting, creative parts of himself are dying, that makes him so tired he can't do the work he really wants to do.
Baby steps.
Goats.
Lettuces and mustard greens:

We'll make it through the other side of this, I know.

At least I made some pretty things:


I managed an update, although not as large as I'd planned...some yarns and a few scarves. I have several things that need some attention from my camera...new cards and some other little goodies. Next time.

I have completed a pdf version of the hat pattern I posted about a while back...I have absolutely no idea how to get it up on Ravelry or even onto my website. It's free, so if anyone wants me to send it via email, let me know. I'll play around and see if I can figure out how to make it more accessible.

C is home today, so we're going to complete our planting...most importantly, the bean seeds around the Little Guy's Bean Teepee:

Can I please be three now, and play in my sandbox in the cool shade of vining bean plants? Lucky duck.

Ta for now, and happy Monday y'all.

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